


They Forgot Me

by puddingroots



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Actors, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, hapiele are all assholes, i have depression over the event announcement
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-29
Packaged: 2019-07-04 02:54:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15832305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puddingroots/pseuds/puddingroots
Summary: Hajime wasn't in the event, AGAIN





	They Forgot Me

November was so close. It was closer than Hajime would like to admit to himself as he saw the announcement for the next event on his social media. He knew that it was only a matter of time until it was his turn, he knew, he really did. But it doesn’t mean that seeing his friend’s face there instead of his hurt any less. Hajime had been there for the photoshoot to support Tomoya and Mitsuru, just like they had for him during his Halloween photoshoot. He had been smiling and showing them all the joy he felt seeing his unit finally get to be noticed a little more. 

 

Oh how he longed to be there with Kanzaki instead. 

 

Seeing the fans of their game get so excited about his unit members and his senpais did make him feel happy to some extent. But nothing really could help Hajime get over seeing banner after banner of his fellow actors and fans piling into the comments with their joy, but never seeing his face there. Curling into himself, Hajime sniffled and tried not to just hurl his phone at the wall as hard as he could. He was trying so  _ hard _ to keep the tears in. But November was close. And he was at a breaking point. 

 

Retreating into his room, Hajime shut his phone down and unplugged his computer, not wanting contact with anyone. He began burning lavender incense trying to calm himself down and dragged all three blankets off his bed to wrap around himself in a ball on the floor, effectively shutting himself away from the world. His company forgetting about him he could understand, there were a lot more talented actors working on the Ensemble Stars! Project than him and he was fully aware that he didn’t stand out. He could even forgive the players for not noticing his long absence from events as a four star. What was eating away at Hajime’s chest, making it hard to breath and forcing him to clutch the blankets even tighter, was his fellow actors not noticing he wasn’t around often.

 

In his head he knew that the clubs and units he was always surrounded by were a false reality created by the studio to please the players but in his heart Hajime wanted so bad to be a part of the real Tea Club or the real Ra☆bits, to have that unconditional support of his Nii-chan or the soft words of Eichi-onii chan. His tears started flowing even stronger as he thought of Eichi-onii and Ritsu-onii. When Hajime’d seen them in the recent months his heart had burst with affection (he’d maxed out Ritsu’s last event four star but he didn’t need to know that) and he wanted nothing more than to be doing that with them. His tears were turning into sobs.

 

Weeks and weeks of disappointment was finally starting to crash down on him and his lungs were burning with the effort it took to keep crying. He really didn’t want to be forgotten, it was hurting him so much and he couldn’t tell anyone. Who would he tell? The other actors and his company would assume he was just trying to get more publicity and his family wouldn’t understand his feelings no matter how he worded it. He didn’t even have many friends outside of work because of his busy schedule. So Hajime was completely alone, shaking and curled up in blankets, the smoke from his burning incense curling around his quivering figure, as he accepted that he was forgotten for nearly 3 years in a row.

 

* * *

 

 

Hajime really had no idea how long he’d been crying before he passed out on the floor where he sat so he was genuinely surprised when he heard his front door swing open. Had he forgotten to lock it? Was someone robbing him and just making his day that much worse? No matter what it was, Hajime remained in his blankets hoping the rest of the world would just disappear around him. Or he would disappear. That doesn’t sound like a bad option right now with his eyes stinging and the knowledge that he was likely about to lose all his valuable belongings because even a thief forgot he was home. He didn’t even lift his head when he felt the blankets being unwrapped around him. That is, until he heard his nickname.

 

“Haakun?”

 

Hajime’s had to be hearing things. He had to. He squeezed his knees tighter to his body until he shook with the effort it exhausted to stay like that, not wanting to face the owner of the voice now. A few quiet mumbles were heard before cool hands gently removed his arms from around his knees, allowing the intruders to lift him up to face them. And if Hajime had any tears left to cry, he would’ve burst into sobs again. 

 

Ritsu and Eichi were standing in his bedroom both looking like they’d just run a marathon. Ritsu clearly wasn’t as strong as his namesake vampire because he was rumpled and sweating but  _ present _ . He looked at Hajime like he was a treasured object he had been positive he had lost but had just found again and Eichi was the same. The second Hajime opened his mouth to say something they came crashing into him, crushing his small form between their larger ones and holding him there firmly. 

 

“Hajime-kun where in the world have you been?”   
  


“We were trying to contact you for hours Haakun I thought you died…”

 

“Are you okay? Are you sick or hurt? You know to call us to take care of you!”

 

The overwhelming onslaught of worry from his fictional club mates made Hajime’s chest clench so hard he would’ve doubled over had he not been sandwiched between the other actors so tightly. He was struggling to breath from the sheer overwhelming feeling of having them here, with him, like this. He craned his neck up to look at Eichi’s concerned expression and, in a cracked voice, let out a, “I thought you had forgotten about me.”

 

“Hajime-kun!” Eichi nearly sobbed at the declaration and pulled him, and Ritsu, closer until the trio lost their balance and fell onto Hajime’s bare bed. Hajime could feel Ritsu quietly crying behind him and Eichi franticly mumbling about how they could never forget him while burying his face into the crown of Hajime’s hair. Ritsu’s soft sobs about how they should’ve known and how he wishes he was there for Hajime made the young actor start crying all over again no matter how much his body protested. Dry sobs wracked him as he wrapped his arms and legs around Eichi and inhaled his expensive cologne that just made him cry harder.

 

“I didn’t want you to forget me the whole company forgot about me and my unit keeps forgetting about me and I know that we’re just coworkers but I loved being ‘Tea Club’ with you so much I couldn’t bear to keep seeing everyone but me! If I was let go because no one wanted content I… I’d…” Hajime’s ramble trailed off into incoherent hiccups as Eichi began to calm down and stroke his hair. Ritsu’s breath was still shaking but he too was calming down as Hajime grew more hysterical. It was like they wanted to be the grounding presences that Hajime had come to know them as over the years. Ritsu’s gentle coo was muffled against Hajime’s shoulder blades as he muttered, “I’d never let you go Haakun,” and Eichi shared in his sentiment. 

 

The pair had been out of their minds trying to contact Hajime when he’d gone under after the announcement. The whole cast kept up with the game even when they weren’t involved so when a peaceful day at a cafe turned sour at the sight of Tomoya’s face instead of Hajime, they immediately grew nervous. And those nerves had only grown with every hour Hajime hadn’t answered calls or messages or social media comments until they used the key they knew Hajime hid on his doorframe to come into his house over 12 hours after Hajime disappeared. They cared far more for their fellow actor than even the company, and, seeing how distraught the object of their affections was, Hajime himself knew. Eichi cupped Hajime’s cheek and brought his face up so their eyes met, heart breaking at the red rimming the younger boy’s eyes, and whispered, “Hajime-kun you have no idea how valuable you are.”

 

“I can’t believe that Eichi-onii, not after-” Hajime couldn’t finish because Ritsu’s hand flew up to cover his mouth. He drew Hajime’s face to look at him and met him teary eyes on teary eyes. He sounded angry despite how cracked his voice was when he said, “after nothing! You’re worth everything to us Haakun! The company doesn’t know anything. The players are here for fanservice. They can’t see you,” Ritsu took a deep breath before his hand moved from Hajime’s mouth to his cheek and his red eyes started leaking tears onto Hajime’s exposed forehead, “for who you are.”

 

“You’re kind and supportive even though the staff can’t see it, you’re more invested in this job than any of us, you put everything you have into your performances and yet you don’t ask for more. You’re so selfless it’s eating you alive and you deserve so much better than that Haakun.” 

 

Eichi was still carding his fingers through Hajime’s hair as he listened to Ritsu belt his feelings to the shell shocked boy in his arms. He had a strong feeling that Hajime had never heard anyone be this aggressively affectionate and he needed to be the soft guiding voice of reason he supposed. “Ritsu-kun please quiet down, Hajime-kun has been through a lot today,” he soothed and gently placed a hand on Ritsu’s shoulder to guide him back onto the mattress and around the shaking body between them.

Hajime still couldn’t believe what he was hearing, three years of being forgotten by everyone around him took a toll on his self esteem. But he couldn’t deny that Eichi and Ritsu were with him now, saying things that he never thought he would be able to hear. He sniffled and shifted upward slightly to nudge his face into the crook of Eichi’s neck and confessed, “I love you two so much I couldn’t bear losing you…” He was so emotionally drained in the moment it didn’t even register what he said until he felt Ritsu’s lips on his neck and Eichi’s on his head. 

 

“We love you too Hajime-kun,” Eichi spoke for both himself and Ritsu as he returned to stroking Hajime’s hair and Ritsu kept kissing at Hajime’s exposed shoulders. Ritsu was trying to show without words how much he cared, he was never like Eichi when it came to speaking. The feather light touches of his lips were the best he could do to show Hajime, without scaring him, that he could never forget about him. He made a mental note while listening to Hajime sniff and Eichi speak to him that he needed to chew out Happy Elements for doing this to him for so long because this wasn’t just a juvenile feeling of loneliness. This was Hajime throwing his entire life into this career and having no one around him show that his efforts aren’t in vain. And Ritsu wouldn’t stand for it anymore. 

 

“Ritsu-onii please come closer, please don’t leave,” came Hajime’s soft voice from against Eichi’s skin and that was it for the pair. They snuggled up around Hajime and littered him in gentle kisses and kind words until the young actor finally fell asleep in their arms, Ritsu following soon after. Eichi separated himself from the pile to pick up one of the blankets from the floor before returning to cocoon the trio in it.

 

Hajime knew his fear of abandonment wasn’t going to go away after all these years, but at least now he knew that he had people with him that would help to overcome his feelings. Ritsu and Eichi were what he needed and when he woke up the next morning, cradled between the pair, he knew that he was so, so loved. 

**Author's Note:**

> my friend nate and i have been depressed abt no hajime for so long this event announcement just made it worse


End file.
